I had a Singaporean gathering on the first day of the QingMing holiday. Lest you didn’t already know, china has like three days of public holidays for it. So you know, it’s unlike the situation here in China where you have more males than females, Singapore has generally more females than males. and being a pea sized country, there’re only that much of Singaporean you could find in China, let alone studying in the same school.
some bailed on us and ended up there were only like four of us—-3f1m. lol
So the point of this post is not about the gathering itself, it’s like one of the topics we touched on.
I forgot what we were talking about, I just randomly (as usual) threw something really random out. I asked, “So you know, I’ve watched this show and there was this couple went to a marriage psychologist to try and salvage their marriage. The problem they are having is that when they are having sex, the wife screamed “Tom!” out loud and the husband stopped and was like, “…who did you just screamEd?!” The wife told the psychologist that the “Tom” was Tom Cruise, and that she did not cheat on him. So what do you ladies think? Cheated or not ?”
Both of my friends answered— NO.
One even said, “It’s considered no when I think about it, but maybe when he thought of it…then maybe or yes!”
Interesting topic, yes?
More often than not, we (for me at the very least) feel that it’s harder for us to really cheat than men. In this case, I’m trying to eliminate the possibilities of a slut and a Casanova. Just a normal girl dating a normal guy. I would think or tend to think that normally a girl needs to be emotionally attached to have sex(I already said to exclude those who think ONS is fine) and that guy can just have sex for sex–not emotionally attached.
So the question is, does thinking of someone else considered cheating?
I think it’s treading on a very fine line between “is cheating” and “not cheating”. If let say you tell me M thought of Jennifer Lopez when he’s in bed with me, maybe I’ll be like “what?so you think I’m not as pretty as her Izzit.”–jokingly. And I won’t even harp another second on it. BUT if m was that stupid to tell me, “Kiki, I thought of my ex GF when I was having sex with you” then trust me, I will castrate him for 1)insulting me, 2)still thinking of his ex gf, 3)for being a jerk to me.
So I guess it’s down to how you look at it? Some would say they would rather you have meaningless physical sex with someone else with no string attached than you keep thinking of them emotionally and not having physical sex.
Well if say m watches porn, I MAY not be happy. Just saying,
Will there ever be a standard answer for this question? Maybe not.